Classy Lee How to be classy and stay classy

25Jan/10Off

Classy Priorities

Drinking can be fun.  Wait.  Drinking IS fun!  At the end of a solid night of partying and boozing it is important to get all of your priorities in line.

1)  Make sure to get some food - the preferred "restaurant" is ALWAYS Taco Bell.

2)  Now pick a nice cozy spot to lay your head ...  the floor will do.

3)  Make sure your phone is nearby (for all those late night texts).

Now inhale your food, lay down and pass out with both your phone and evidence of your taco feast on top of you.  This is the scene of a good night!

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8Aug/09Off

Class Up the Laundry Room

Some of us have more clothes than others. Those lucky ones can go weeks without doing laundry given the amount of ensembles and Sunday best outfits they have in their possession. Classy Lee can go months without doing laundry. He does not even need a hamper to keep all of his clothes. He just piles them up next to the washer until it is time to take care of business. Roommates and scientists have been baffled about when this "time" may be. Some are speculating that Classy Lee will end up doing laundry once the Mayan calendar ends in December of 2012. That's right, the cataclysm everyone is worried about in 2012 is actually the time when Classy Lee may do his laundry.

Some of us also wonder what goes on beneath the pile of clothes in the laundry room. At the time of this posting some of those clothes have been sitting there for well over a month, or four days in Classy Lee time. Some of us are afraid to go near the pile out of fear that we will be infected by an unknown strain of botulism. In the event we have to get to the blockaded cabinet behind the pile of clothes to get the trash bags, special care must be taken: 1.) Do NOT breathe. 2.) Close eyes. 3.) Have your roommate dial 9-1, and then 1 again if something bad happens.

On the other hand, piling your clothes right next to the washer is efficient. When it is time to do laundry, one will not need a dump truck to haul all of the dirty clothes from the bedroom or bathroom to the laundry room. That's what I call efficiency.

31Jul/09Off

The Classy Garage

The greatest thing about renting most houses is having access to a garage. You know you are making it big when you can get a two car garage. That's right, a two car garage just for yourself. Roommates have cars you say? Screw 'em, you work your four hours a day to deserve to park your 1991 Chevy Van without any other vehicles nearby to lower the class of your ride.

So what do you use the rest of the garage for? Classy Lee has some ideas. See his list below:

1.) Junk

classy_garage

There you go. Junk. Just leave junk all over the garage. In the photo above, you can take note of the roommate's bike trapped by junk. This ensures your dominance over the garage. Classy Lee decided to put the most random assortment of belongings in his garage, such as: a fake plant, boxes (for filler), mop, credit card, grocery bags full of junk, and let's not forget ... the bucket of transmission fluid.

bucket

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14Jul/09Off

Class up your house

Living with roommates requires patience, compromise, and respect on everyone's part. Roommates get along well as long as everyone does their part to keep things reasonably tidy and in-order. Whenever you want to class up your apartment or house for your roommates, follow these organizational tips:

Consistently stack up your dirty laundry in the laundry room such that you block the cabinets and storage areas with a month's worth of clothes. Leave a funny looking bandana with a chile pepper on it on the dryer because it looks cool and takes up space. Keep a bra neatly folded on the washer. Leave tons of shit in garage, such as boxes, fake plants, garbage bags, a bucket full of transmission fluid, a mop, a dusty entertainment center, and even credit card on floor. Place your muddy and stinky hiking boots on couch for easy access. Keep a spare desk heater nearby on the counter just in case. A cable box comes in handy, so leave that on the counter as well. To finish it all off, leave a used Lysol wipe in a conspicuous place.